Accentuate the Positives in a Relationship
- By Terry Leslie
- Published 29 August 2008
- Dating
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Rating:
Unrated
The way we think and what we focus on determines a great deal of what we get and how we get it. When we have a goal we reach for getting something. When we reach for "not getting" we most often fail because we are hanging out on the negative. When we look at the women and the potential for serious romantic inclination, our positive and negative thought patterns determine a great deal. For instance, we can say we aren't ready to reach that high up the ladder or we can say we want a woman who is about as equally successful as ourselves. We can say that we don't want a woman who is motivated sexually or we can say that we want a woman who is sincere and honest. Our belief systems are created with the understanding of what we want, our brains don't interpret the don't want factor as well.
Negative thoughts and feelings whether they are about you or women are the main reason that we fail. A lot of men profess to really love women but in reality they don't like women much at all. How can you love something when you are constantly angry at it and blaming it for your problems? When you listen to yourself talk about women, are you putting them down or raising them up? Are you calling women derogatory names and channeling your anger about an incident toward the gender? So often I hear, "what the bitches want" or "give it to a slut and she'll screw for a night. Bring a slut home and she'll screw for a lifetime." These are not positive aspects of the gender. Men want to get into the panties of women as fast as possible but when a woman gives it up she is now a total slut with no self respect. How fair is that? How do you think women interpret this information?
When we project negative vibes based on these sorts of feelings and thoughts, we often don't attract very positive people into our world. Thus, when we find a woman she really isn't the woman that we wanted and now we are feeling stuck with her because we don't feel we can do much better. If we make sure the woman we are involved with doesn't appear to be any better than us, then we don't have to worry about living up to a standard. But yet we want to be so frustrated with the woman we brought home and we think poorly of her. After awhile, she becomes sick of the negativity and instead of addressing it with you, she runs away in the middle of the night. But what did you expect, after all, since you brought home such a low caliber woman?
These patterns are of our own doing. When we simply start to believe in the prospect of fulfilling our own fantasies with our own thoughts and feelings, we start to attract a higher class of women. We actually start to attract a much better class of women that treat us better and who treat themselves better. It becomes almost too simplistic to believe. But once you try it you will never go back.
The most positive element that you can do for yourself is believe that there is no such thing as failure. And there really isn't. Failure is just a different result than we initially expected. So when things turn out differently than we expected then there is something we can learn to create a better world for ourselves. It really doesn't have to be all that complicated and it can be tackled with one simple belief. Failure does not exist. When we truly believe that, then we are no longer burdened by the behaviors of other people that don't meet our expectations and we are free to make our own errors without being considered monstrosities that should be hidden in the basement and only let out after dark. Failure is just a perception that we give to ourselves and a word that we use to express our own self inflicted unhappiness with a situation.
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